I wanna talk more about it. It was just a few moments I thought it was 9:30 and I could bathe, but suddenly it was 10:30 and I have to start preparing for the job. It's like my time is not my own. I realize it has to do with my job, and keeping the schedule active. But it's wrong. It's wrong in a very spiritual way. Renting cars to people is not advancing my own spiritual growth, except by the $2 an hour that I get which permit me to keep this apartment and feed these kids. It's wrong but it's also right. 

My writing projects are on the backburner. Cleaning up my room is on the back burner. Walking to pay the rent is on the bakc burner. I think of the days before my job, when I had all day to do nothing. I was becoming lazy, complacent. Now, there are so many things I wanna do... And I don't. 

10:38. In approximately 12 minutes, I will start taking calls. That's how it works. 

When I am done, I am too tired to write, too tired to think of anything but crashing and watching a few videos on youtube or playing sims. 

The great change is coming. It's gonna be brutal. It's gonna be great.